Comparison is the Thief of Joy

From the desk of Grace Lange,

Do you ever look at a photo of someone or see someone at work or just walking on the street and you are automatically in a bad mood? Your mind shifts from cool and confident to jealous and insecure. 

You think… gosh they are so pretty or dang they are so skinny or they totally have it all together, and I know they are a better mom or friend or co-worker than me. 

These thoughts are so ingrained into our minds that they have become unconscious thoughts – you don’t even know you do it anymore….

It is also hard to recognize why we are unhappy sometimes. 

Comparison to those around us steals our happiness. 

Immediately when we start to compare ourselves to others, we have these ideas that we are not good enough, we are not worthy, pretty, smart, exciting, and the list goes on. 

Comparison, for me, is the greatest thief of my joy. 

When I see people around me succeeding or losing weight, getting married, or getting a great promotion at work, I instantly feel like I am doing something wrong. 

When I first started my business, I was on top of the world. I thought I had it all…

But as soon as I realized that it was harder than I thought it was going to be, I started to look at my friends who seemed to be so much happier than me and thought… 

Gosh their life seems so much better….

Why am I doing this to myself? 

I found myself having regrets and losing confidence in what I knew, because it didn’t seem like anyone else was doing what I was doing. 

I thought this was what I wanted, but because no one else around me was doing it, I thought I was wrong.

I knew I loved what I was doing, and I knew I was going in the right direction… 

But even now, if I think I am happy with where I am, negative thoughts still always seem to creep in. 

Why do we compare ourselves to everyone around us? 

Do we really believe that what others have would make us happy? 

Comparison is truly the thief of joy. 

When you are so focused on what others are doing or what others look like, it is very easy to think what you are doing is wrong or that you don’t have a purpose…

It takes a conscious effort to tell yourself that you are exactly where you are supposed to be right now. 

Instead of looking at that girl and thinking… gosh, she is such a good mom and a good wife. 

She is always with her kids and spending time with her husband… Am I a horrible wife if I haven’t gone on a date with my husband in a month? 

NO. Maybe that woman you saw just lost her job, so all she has is her kids and her husband. 

You never ever know what is going on inside someone else’s head. 

You know that one saying – Don’t assume, because it makes an ass out of you and me. 

Comparison is like assuming. It makes an ass out of you, because you are speaking to yourself negatively, and you make an ass out of the other person, because most likely you are having negative thoughts about them too. 

Comparison isn’t fair, and it isn’t joyful. Why would you want to do anything that’s not fair and joyful? 

You are awesome. Who cares what the other girl is doing.

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