Ratios Build Confidence

From the desk of Kelsey Buell,

What do you know about ratios? 

I’m no math person, but this concept of ratios building confidence is one that I’m really passionate about…

I think of ratios as a percentage, and in the case of this message, a percentage of what you want to work out, will work out. 🙂

Let me explain.

Here’s a question…

Has anyone ever disappointed you….? Left you hanging? Told you no? Told you yes and then didn’t pull through?

I think the further in life you get, the easier it is to feel disappointed by others.

I used to do advertising sales…and for those of you who have ever been in any type of sales, you know it can be brutal.

I would get companies who would tell me yes and then back out of the contract…

…followed by individuals who would string me along, only to tell me no…

…followed by clients who would come on board and pay and then never answer a single phone call after that.

People are tough, and it’s easy to let the no’s, the let downs, and the confusing behavior be taken personally.

But through the course of time, I’ve developed a more flourishing mindset that allows these little nuances not bother me so much anymore…

Here’s what I learned…

There’s this thing called the “10-3-1 rule”. I did not invent it. It was actually designed by a Northwestern Mutual Financial Advisor named Al Granum years and years ago…after he was in sales for many years and studied what the successful advisors were doing.

What this concept is, is that for every 10 people you reach out to for a sale, you’ll have an in-depth, more thorough and serious conversation with 3, and then 1 will commit to taking action (or buying goods or services).

So what does this mean? There’s actually a scientifically proven method to when take action on their commitments.

Now you may be thinking…cool, but I’m actually not in sales.

And if that’s you, that’s totally okay, this still applies in your personal life too…

The numbers might not shake out exactly like 10-3-1, but you’ll find some similarities.

Picture this…

You’re planning a get together at your house for your spouse’s birthday. You are so excited and want a great turnout.

You decide to be selective and only invite 3 couples.

“This will be great!” you think…

Then, at the last minute, one of the couples decides to go to a concert instead, and the other couple gets sick.

You are left with only one other couple coming to your spouse’s birthday party.

Maybe this is okay with you, but most would feel defeated and disappointed and think….I wish I would have invited someone else or a few more people.

Maybe next time you plan a party, you’ll invite a few extra people knowing that someone will drop out…

The moral of the story is, we need to expect fallout…

People are busy and things come up.

So how can ratios help you be more confident?

It adds logic to an emotional situation.

Instead of getting upset or put off by someone dropping out, letting you down, or telling you no, you can tell yourself…”it’s just part of the ratio, and it’s to be expected that not everyone will pull through.”

Now I know what you might be thinking…man, it’s too bad that we can’t have faith in others and I’m not sure I like this concept, because it’s giving the other person an out.

…and I get that.

I just know that protecting my mental health when I get let down tends to be a priority, and this is what has helped me weather the storm and take a more carefree approach to life’s obstacles.

So what can you do?

The next time someone cancels on you or you get told no, tell yourself…”It’s just the law of ratios! This was bound to happen…” 

And allow yourself to move on without stewing on the “why” of them dropping out so much.

Furthermore, this concept has also offered me the opportunity to allow more forgiveness and grace into my life.

When someone would back out of a commitment with me (personal or professional) I used to take it personally.

Now, I don’t take it so personally anymore.

Instead, I think…”This person has given me the gift of time back on my calendar. How can I utilize this God-given gift today?”

Has there been a time recently when you were disappointed with someone? Or feel like someone let you down?

Remember, it’s all just part of the ratios of life…

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