By: Grace Lange
You walk into the office after a great weekend with your family, sit down at your desk, open your computer, and the first thing you see is an email from your boss saying you screwed up a massive project for your company.
Day instantly ruined.
If you are anything like me, you will dwell on this horrible email all day long, and struggle to overcome this issue.
The crazy woman in your head who shows up every time you make a mistake continues to tell you that you are worthless, dumb, and will probably lose your job, because you just suck at everything. This crazy woman in the attic, the attic of your brain, has a sneaky way of showing up….
Where does your crazy woman show up?
Whether it’s when you make a mistake or when you choose one thing over another, or when you are about to present your ideas to a new group of people.
Wherever she shows up, it is essential that we learn how to shut her up and change our mindset. After surveying 18 women through extensive programming, we have discovered the top ways to change your mindset and block out the crazy woman in the attic.
- Give yourself permission.
Give yourself permission to not be perfect. Before each day, beginning an interview, meeting, or making a decision, give yourself the grace and consent to not be perfect. Every mistake is an opportunity to learn.
2. Separate your feelings from your work.
First, think to yourself: Am I taking this personal? Should I be? It can be extremely difficult to separate your feelings from the task, especially for women. As women, we are naturally created to be kind, caring, and attentive to the needs of others. In business this can be a difficult battle to face. How can you be caring and assertive all at the same time?
Do not take things so personally. You are important and the feelings of others are important, but recognizing the intent of others in a work setting rather than their feelings, can save you heartbreak in the long run.
3. Recognize and Reflect.
You can learn so much, not just about you, but about the people around you, from the power of pausing and reflecting. The first step to overcoming anything is recognizing what is effecting you. When does your crazy woman show up, and when does she come out the strongest?
4. What’s the worst that can happen?
When something goes wrong, or you feel pressure to be perfect, play the entire scenario out in your head and discover what you feel could be the worst outcome. Will anyone die? Will your company go bankrupt? Will you lose your job? Probably not. Sometimes you need to use the “worst case scenario” tactic to recognize that your mistake, though it may seem like a big deal at the time, is not the end of the world.
When you choose to call that crazy woman in the attic out, you allow yourself to have control of your mindset at work and at home.
You walk into the office on Monday morning and receive a nasty email from your boss…
Your first instinct is to take a minute and reflect. You recognize that you made a mistake, you internally forgive your boss for the rude email, and you reflect on how they made you feel.
….then you tell the negative thoughts in your head to get out, and you choose to allow yourself to be imperfect and acknowledge that you will try harder next time, because it’s all you can do.
You shift your mindset, and you move on. Your mindset is the most important part of your attitude.
What you put in your mind is what you get out. Fill it with goodness.